My mom dating much younger man speed dating chemistry
For the next six months, Mike and I were just friends.I made sure to regularly ask about whom he was dating, because I didn't want him to think I was interested.Then my grandmother gave me the rest of the details: the guy my mom is dating is 22 and is moving in with her in less than a month.Apparently, she has been secretly dating this guy for months.It wasn't until the next day that my friend revealed he was only 25. I didn't know them personally, but I was pretty sure none of them had been divorced—which I had by time I was their age.Still, when Mike and I went out for drinks, I barely thought about our age gap until our server asked for our IDs. I felt like the two additional decades of hard-won life experience created a wall between me and the group—and between Mike and me. Yes, I'd heard of Drake and Snapchat, but it wasn't pop culture.Yes, the age difference bothers me, but not nearly as much as her inviting a guy whom my brothers have NEVER MET move in with them!I feel like she is disregarding her role as mother in favor of some new relationship that gives her a sense of value.
When I tell him Mike he can't knowif he wants children, he thinks I'm being condescending and close-minded. But I went back and forth on the kids thing somany times in my 30s that I don't want him to shut a door he may want to open in the future.We've discussed marriage, but always in the abstract—like when we went to one of his friend's weddings, we imagined what our ceremony would look like.We talk in terms of a permanent "we"—weshould buy a house, we want to live by the ocean at some point in our lives.She met him online, and they met for the first time in real life this September. I wrestled with the age difference, and my Grandmother talked me down from my state of dumfounded shock.She told my grandmother that she didn’t tell anyone because she said she knew we would judge her (damn straight! She told me my mom was old enough to make her own mistakes, and that we would talk about it more when I saw her in person on Thanksgiving. But the more I thought about it, the angrier I got.
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Two years later, Mike and I are definitely a couple—we live together and we're deeply in love.