Dating a victim of domestic violence
Sometimes we don’t want to be alone with the sadness we feel, and being with a caring person feels so comforting. Our abuser left us feeling like we aren’t good enough for a healthy and loving relationship.
You can help by telling us we are going too fast, and need to slow down. We are working hard to overcome that damage, harder than you might see just looking at us from the outside.
Strong communication skills help you enjoy better relationships with friends and family.
Being an effective communicator will give you advantages in more ways than you can imagine.
Sometimes we tell ourselves what our abusers told us, like “you’re no good”, or “how could anyone love you”, or “I hit you because you deserve it.” We need time to get over the damage to our self-esteem.
You can help by understanding that sometimes when we are depressed it can be because we are hearing these thoughts.
We might push to spend all of our time together, maybe move in together, take vacations together, meet family, all on a schedule that might feel too fast for you.
Effective communication is defined as verbal speech or other communication methods to get your point across. It’s the ability to say something at the right time; to be able to get multiple people on the same page in a group decision.Getting close to someone physically means being extra-vulnerable. At times, the fear of getting close enough to be hurt again can make us try to push you away. Sometimes when you are getting really close to us we feel most scared and confused. We’re actually trying to open up and connect but sometimes the fear overtakes us.We might lash out in anger, withdraw, or be critical. Sometimes people who’ve experienced partner abuse jump into new relationships, hungry for the love and affirmation they didn’t find with the abusive partner. Most people experience some insecurity when getting to know a potential partner.Figuring out how to read another person’s signs and signals is part of the dating experience. What about when the person you’re dating has been in an abusive relationship?